Top Ten Thread

Aaron called me several days ago and was excited to talk about Obama. Well I have to say it excited me some too. If a man could get Aaron interested in politics I’m game to hear what he has to say. So I dig around some to find out what Obama is really about. Mainly I hear a bunch of noise and misinformation. So I have to really wonder What’s Up. Candidate for America or just another big business crook. Anyways heres to you Mr Obama. Pure satire folks but if you read the paper you will think its true.

Top Ten Media reasons Why not to cast your ballot for Obama

10 His wife is finally proud of America

9 He plaigarized words from the person who told him to use them.

8 Went to Harvard

7 Lawyer

6 He used election laws to remove his opponents from the ballot

5 Hes all stinky and smelly

4 Hes a black man

3 His name rhymes with Osama

2 Did I say he was black?

1 Change

Was it here or somewhere else I saw a link (youtube maybe, but cant find it now) to a Jay Leno show where he had some guy on videolink with a bunch of Obama supporters all seated in a room. Jay asked the guy to ask each of the supporters to name any one thing, just one thing Obama had achieved in his entire political career. Not a single one of them had an answer, until one replied “he’s a great orator” and then of couple of others nodded as if that really covered it. Amazing. It’s a cult.

~ ~ update:

it wasn’t Jay Leno, it was Hannity & Colmes. Here’s the clip:

[url:1ygs7wdd]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PzFOOcEQtP0[/url:1ygs7wdd]

funny.

~ ~ update:

Part two of the same ‘interview’ - given a second chance, and specifically told they just need to name one single accomplishment, not an attribute, they still couldn’t come up with anything, ’they’ being a Democrat Focus Group.. guess they weren’t focusing too hard huh..:

[url:1ygs7wdd]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NgXPVmlXKQI[/url:1ygs7wdd]

the best they could do was say that he was an African American that got elected to senate. Sorry, that’s not an accomplishment as a politician (as a senator), that’s a personal accomplishment. Oh, and none of them saw any significant difference in policy between Obama and Hillary..

I guess for the Dems it’s down to gender versus ethnicity.

..which is more choice than afforded the poor Republicans and the foul-tempered little troll McCain that claims to represent them.

:twisted:

Looks like weasels discovered politics is actually about popularity and public opinion more than anything else. Your surprised?

I don’t live in America but from what I’ve read, and researched, it seems when it all comes down to it, all these candidates are pretty much the same old candy inside a different wrapping.

I’m trying to think in my life when a change of government actually had a direct effect on my life… truth is, it’s never happened.

all these candidates are pretty much the same old candy inside a different wrapping.

I’m trying to think in my life when a change of government actually had a direct effect on my life… truth is, it’s never happened.[/quote:qvyap3ce]

golden words

I’m shocked !!!

Is someone trying to suggest that American Polotics is a triumph of style over substance?

I thought that only happened here.

Looks like weasels discovered politics is actually about popularity and public opinion more than anything else. Your surprised?

I don’t live in America but from what I’ve read, and researched, it seems when it all comes down to it, all these candidates are pretty much the same old candy inside a different wrapping.

I’m trying to think in my life when a change of government actually had a direct effect on my life… truth is, it’s never happened.[/quote:1td098zw]

Wow you must be rich and live on a desert island and have no human contact to think that politics don’t affect you. Anyone who ever shops, drives, lives or breathes is affected by politics- you just may be unaware of it.

While we’re all posting our best ’top ten’s :

Top Ten most common passwords:

‘123’ (3.784â€°)
‘password’ (3.780â€°)
’liverpool’ (1.82â€°)
’letmein’ (1.76â€°)
‘123456’ (1.63â€°)
‘qwerty’ (1.41â€°)
‘charlie’ (1.39â€°)
‘monkey’ (1.33â€°)
‘arsenal’ (1.11â€°)
’thomas’ (0.99â€°)

Sample from UK Office workers who were gullible to tell someone else their password just for a survey.

2imms: how it happened passwords for almost all brads chars posted on crier?

i’m shocked!

Vixn

Strangely enough a lot of this is [u:2no20kka]half[/u:2no20kka] truth… :D

My government just underwent a change a few months back… nothing has changed for me and my lifestyle… I think it’s probably more revolutions that bring person to person change rather than democratic elections.

In democratic countries I think parties are more conservative and less different, than say in a country… where a farmer gets some mates, hires a machine gun and stages a coup. Might I add I heard this was how the pirates of slothmud were formed…

Maybe your on the right track about me Alias, it would seem your more passionate about it from the sidelines than I am. I guess if you move in the circle of politics your more likely to see the changes than someone like me who really couldn’t care less. It could be a case of yelling “I can’t see!” and someone yelling back “open your eyes!” :twisted:

Still I’d have to say though, that it’s my job, family and friends that influence my lifestyle, and I can’t ever remember a government that directly interfered with mine in that way.

[img:6pweaelo]http://yasik.kiev.ua/I_Like_Where_This_Thread_Is_Going.jpg[/img:6pweaelo]

Maybe those who can’t see a difference haven’t been able to live ‘misguided’ freedom and thus don’t really know what they are missing. In this day and age there rumors/accusations of what may/may not happen should the “wrong” candidate get elected. Level an accusation and you get labeled a racist,sexist,religious nut or conspiracy theorist. Personally, I think they are all f’n crooked. I’m content to sit back and watch them destroy themselves. Yet, even knowing that I will undoubtly been the one to suffer the most, I’m a big believer in karma and knowing that the devil will receive his in due time.

[img:vq7ijs53]http://img125.imageshack.us/img125/1313/1203464591525gp7.gif[/img:vq7ijs53]

wow. good post Tap.

Where are all the top ten lists? To bring this thread back onto title subject:

Top Ten things to do with a broken lightbulb:

Don’t change it, just say you are conserving energy.

Carry it to business meetings, and then when someone asks you a question, hold it over your head and say you are all out of fresh ideas.

Try to recharge it.

Collect a boxful, then sneak into a neighbors house and change all of their bulbs and tell them them their electricity was cut off.

Mount it and watch it instead of the TV.

Drop it in the community pond and see if it floats.

Take it to a rock concert and hold it in front of you and wave it around (because you are too cheap to buy a lighter).

Smash it with a hammer.

Sell it to a stupid kid on the street.

Hold it upside-down in the middle of a flat field during a thunderstorm, wait for lightning, and then watch it glow!

Collect a boxful, then sneak into a neighbors house and change all of their bulbs and tell them them their electricity was cut off.[/quote:3shnemk9]

lol

Hold it upside-down in the middle of a flat field during a thunderstorm, wait for lightning, and then watch it glow![/quote:1ox7ic18]

this really works?

Hold it upside-down in the middle of a flat field during a thunderstorm, wait for lightning, and then watch it glow![/quote:38d6die0]

this really works?[/quote:38d6die0]

What Thraxas said may be a joke, but holding fluorescents up by power lines makes them glow…

If you did the lightbulb/lightning thing, I’m sure you’d have the impression that something had been glowing afterwards :)

And yay for induction.

Top ten reasons to play SlothmudIII

10 Meet Russian hotties

9 Listen to funny penis jokes from Aaron

8 Chuckle about constant whining from overpower nerfs

7 Make fun of Nia

6 Playing a warrior so you can shock people

5 Playing a klurik so you can shock more than a warrior

4 Read crier for child porn pics

3 Pkilling is not allowed (unless you have firestorm,blizzard, or shapeshift)

2 You want to meet some losers from Indiana that live in a garage.

1 You don’t have a job.

Only problem is that I have a job.

Top Ten Bushisms - you can’t make this stuff up!

“Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.” â€”LaCrosse, Wis., Oct. 18, 2000
“I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family.” â€”Greater Nashua, N.H., Jan. 27, 2000
“I hear there’s rumors on the Internets that we’re going to have a draft.” â€”second presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004
“I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.” â€”Saginaw, Mich., Sept. 29, 2000
“You work three jobs? â€¦ Uniquely American, isn’t it? I mean, that is fantastic that you’re doing that.” â€”to a divorced mother of three, Omaha, Nebraska, Feb.4, 2005
“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.” â€”Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004
“They misunderestimated me.” â€”Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000
“Rarely is the questioned asked: Is our children learning?” â€”Florence, S.C., Jan. 11, 2000
“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” â€”Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004
“There’s an old saying in Tennessee â€” I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee â€” that says, fool me once, shame on â€” shame on you. Fool me â€” you can’t get fooled again.” â€”Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

hehehee

Top Ten Dumbest American Congressmen

Senator Jim Bunning (R-KY)

Among his antics that year: Telling a group of GOP fundraisers that his Italian-American opponent, Daniel Mongiardo, physically resembled Saddam Hussein’s sons, Uday and Qusay; referring on the stump to the tragic terror attacks of November 11, 2001; and adding a federal security detail to his campaign in the firm conviction that members of Al Qaedaâ€”the masterminds of November 11â€”had targeted him for elimination. (“There may be strangers among us,” he darkly informed a Paducah TV crew.)

Representative Patrick Kennedy (D-RI)

Plowed his car into a barrier while under the spell of an Ambien-fueled hallucination. He then attempted to convince Capitol police he was late for a floor vote at 3 o’clock in the morning. When the story broke, Kennedy played the recovery card, announcing that he suffered from depression and addictionâ€”to sleep aids and painkillersâ€”and would seek treatment at the Mayo Clinic. [u:35rbted9][b:35rbted9]Twenty-four hours later [/b:35rbted9][/u:35rbted9]the man who had barreled down D.C.’s power boulevards in a runaway Mustang convertible (with the lights off) presented himself as a role model: “I hope my openness today and in the past, and my acknowledgment that I need help, will give others the courage to get help, if they need it.”

Senator Conrad Burns (R-MT)

Be wary of “faceless” Arabs who “drive taxicabs by day and kill at night.” But this minor bit of sociological skylarking actually represents progress, of sorts, considering his 1999 outburst blaming “ragheads” for rising gas prices and additional episodes in 1994 in which he delivered a casual joke from the podium about “niggers” and told another audience that living in Washington with so many blacks “is quite a challenge.”

Representative Cynthia McKinney (D-GA)

First there was her notorious encounter with a Capitol Hill police officer who dared to ask her for ID. After brazenly ignoring several polite requests, the caterwauling congresswoman responded by walloping the officer in the chest. During the ensuing fracas she complained that she was persecuted for “being in Congress while black.” But what really cemented her position at No. 7 was her frivolous threat to sue the Atlanta Journal-Constitution for defamation over an editorial that decried her light record of legislative achievement. “She doesn’t have the power or prestige to pass a resolution in favor of sweetened iced tea,” the paper opined. McKinney fought back by proudly producing a survey that ranked her as the 277th most effective legislator in the House. In fact the survey, by congress.org, placed her at 408.

The embarrassing incident didn’t end her absurd fatwa against the paper. When the Journal-Constitution published a poll showing her opponent in this year’s primary with a commanding lead, McKinney went ballistic again. “We have notified them of their libelist [sic] writing,” she said, darkly. A few days later she lost by 20 points. Now she’s preparing another lawsuit charging that Johnson’s runaway victory was the result of compromised voting machines.

Among the many constituencies that will welcome McKinney’s departure are Atlanta’s Jews: Her fractious relationship with the community dates back to 1992, when her father denounced her then opponent as a “racist Jew.” Two years later, she refused to denounce the anti-Semitic rantings of a Farrakhan aide, and, in 2001, one of her own aides was forced to resign after calling congress an “Israel-occupied territory.” When Rudy Giuliani returned a $10 million 9/11 donation from Saudi Prince Al-Waweed bin Talal, who blamed the attack on the U.S. relationship with Israel, McKinney took it upon herself to write a letter of apology to the prince. And at her concession speech in August, when a staffer was inadvertently struck by a microphone, McKinney supporters not only beat up the reporters on hand, they hurled gems like: “You know what led to this loss? Israel … Zionists! Put your yarmulke on your head and celebrate.” Oy.

Representative Jean Schmidt (R-OH)

“Mean” Jean Schmidt blazed her way into congressional history last year by using her first-ever floor speech to paint Rep. John Murtha, a decorated Marine Corps vet, as a coward, provoking a chorus of jeers and calls for her expulsion (for violating a longstanding rule against personal attacks from the floor.) Adding insult to injury, the Marine to whom she’d attributed the statement denied ever making it. Eventually, the red-faced rep was forced to apologize and begged for her witless remarks to be stricken from the Congressional Record.

Meanwhile, here’s a taste of how she characterizes the mindset of Iraqi civilians. “The Iraqi’s perception is that we’re all powerful,” Schmidt wrote in a recent newsletter, offering her thumbnail portrait of the noble savages. “We watch them from space with technology they cannot even imagine…. They know we can do anything.” If only.

Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA)

Boxer is a limousine liberal running a few gallons short of a full tank. After convening a Democratic press event at a gas station to publicize high oil prices and accuse Bush and Cheney of being too cozy with the oil industry, California’s junior senator “hopped into a waiting Chrysler (18 MPG),” noted the Washington Post, “even though her Senate office was only a block away.”

Then there are Bab’s manglings of diction and logic, such as this chestnut: “Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, ‘Thank God I’m still alive.’ But of course those who died, their lives will never be the same again.” Boxer’s most egregious crimes against language are on florid display in her self-infatuated novel A Time to Run, which features a California senator embarking on a bold, maverick crusade to protect children from violence. One passage describes “a magical time when the three of them caught the rainbow, found the pot of gold beneath it, and managed to forget how easily and swiftly that fairy gold could slip away.” And then there’s the ghastly way Boxer envisions a lustful courtship: “Her skirt was very short, and Josh found himself mesmerized by her perfectly shaped, silken legs [i:35rbted9]with kneecaps that reminded him of golden apples[/i:35rbted9]â€”he couldn’t remember having been captivated by kneecaps beforeâ€”and her lustrous thighs.”

Representative J.D. Hayworth (R-AZ)

After a long tour as a Sunbelt TV sportscaster, Hayworth rode the 1994 Republican revolution into office, where he started things off by telling a group of environmental activists that untrammeled logging was a conservation measure because forests are a fire hazard. He distributed leaflets on the House floor accusing Maryland Democrat Steny Hoyer of promoting “sex training for federal employees,” planning to indoctrinate them into drug use, and pushing New Age cult worship, all because of a proposal to extend health coverage for abortions under dire circumstances. And the amendment Hayworth was protesting so absurdly wasn’t Hoyer’s at allâ€”it was actually the work of Hayworth’s fellow Republican, Rep. Ron Packard of California.

Over the years, he racked up more than $150,000 from Jack Abramoff’s clients, $64,520 in the last election cycle alone, second in the House only to Majority Leader Dennis Hastert. Alone among Congress members, though, Hayworth has refused to return any of the tainted funds, offering only this rationale: the donors don’t want the money back.

Senator James Inhofe (R-OK)

Inhofe is best known for his categorical claim that global warming is “the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people"â€”a rhetorical flourish he recently refined by likening climate change theories to Nazi propaganda. And here’s the scary part: Those are the sentiments of our chairman of the Environment and Public Works Committee. It’s a bit like making Lyndon LaRouche the American Ambassador to England.

But that’s not the half of it. As far back as 1972, he called for Democratic presidential nominee George McGovern to be “hanged with Jane Fonda” for referring to alleged atrocities committed by American troops in Vietnam. In 2001, he took to the Senate floor to announce that Israel was justified in whatever treatment it handed out to Palestinians because, after all, God had promised the Jews the land they occupied. For good measure, he also called Palestinian terror bombers practitioners of “satanic evil,” and intimated to the New Republic that both Bill and Hillary Clinton were out to assassinate him.

And then there was the recent debate over the latest constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage, when Inhofe assured Senate colleagues of his own virility and that of his manly forbearers. “My wife and I have been married 47 years. We have 20 kids and grandkids. I’m really proud to say that in the recorded history of our family, we’ve never had a divorce or a homosexual relationship.” It’s the same flawless gene pool that produced a man who thinks our situation in Iraq is “nothing short of a miracle.”

Representative Donald Young (R-AK)

The scene: Fairbanks, Alaska, 1994. Congressman Don Young, already in office for 20 years, is on the stump preaching the virtues of Newt Gingrich’s Republican revolution to a group of high school students. Just look at all the wasteful things the federal government does with taxpayers’ money, he tells them. The National Endowment for the Arts, for example, funds art involving “people doing offensive things … things that are absolutely ridiculous.” One student asks, “Like what?”

“Buttf***ing,” replies the great scourge of obscenity and instructor of youth.

Young’s performance remains a classic in the annals of congressional idiocy, offering that rare, supremely unselfconscious moment in which one of our nation’s legislative solons lets his addled mind graze freely. But the real irony of this legendary gaffe is that the congressman lecturing on government waste was the very same man who, years later, would be responsible for Alaska’s fabled “Bridge to Nowhere,” a $233 million project constructed entirely of pork. And it’s the same man who, when asked about his state’s outrageous $941 million transportation bill, boasted “I stuffed it like a turkey,” before adding that detractors of the bridgeâ€”equal in length to the Golden Gate but connecting to a town with a population of 50â€”could “kiss my ear.”

Representative Katherine Harris (R-FL)

If dumb Congress members were the X-Men, Harris would be their Wolverineâ€”a mutant possessing fearsome skills, the product of a demented government experiment gone horribly wrong. Back in 2000, the then-Florida secretary of state thrust herself into the national spotlight by peremptorily calling the state for George W. Bush. Of course, the longtime crony of Bush’s brother Jeb was also Florida’s GOP campaign chair.

Florida Republicans responded with sound skepticism when Harris put herself forward to face off against Democratic Senate incumbent Bill Nelson in 2006. But Harris was undaunted, allegedly telling campaign consultant Ed Rollins that God had asked her to run for Senate.

Nevertheless, the Supreme Being seems to have other plans for Florida Republicansâ€”and especially for Harris’s campaign team. Team Harris has hemorrhaged more than 25 senior staff and consultants, Rollins among them, over the past year. They rush for the exits every time there’s a fresh report on Harris’s shady dealing: her $2,800 dinner with MZM defense contractor Mitchell Wade, who reportedly vowed to kick in $200,000 for a Harris fundraiser; her withdrawal of $100,000 from her campaign coffers to pay for repairs to her house; news that the FBI is collecting her campaign e-mails for review; and her decision to conceal from her lead staffer a federal subpoena concerning the abuses.

Mainly, though, there’s her Stalin-esque management style, which includes attacking staffers for such trespasses as procuring the wrong kind of candy, or for screwing up her Starbuck’s order (extra-hot low-foam nonfat venti triple lattes with one packet of Sweet-n-Low). It’s the sort of unhinged megalomania that makes us giddy. At one point, Harris’s battered staffers tested her by submitting a two-month old speech she had written herself: She pronounced it “terrible.” Unfortunately, early polls suggest our No. 1 pick won’t be around to entertain us much longer. Enjoy her while you can.

Not a top ten but i like it .. .enjoy